5 Things to Remember When You are Grieved Within
5 Things to Remember When You are Grieved Within, Even the Hurts of a Pastor’s Wife
You are Never Alone
Feeling alone is heavy. When we are in the midst of grief, we must remember we are never alone. People and churches will fail us, but God never does. Many times our greatest hurts come from imperfect people or unplanned decisions. As a pastor’s wife, I understand some of those decisions may not have been yours. Yet, you often have to bare that load as well. Whatever circumstances have lead you to feeling overtaken in grief or hurt, there is a solution. First though, you need to remember you are not alone. If you are a born again Christian, you are never alone. God knows every thought, every tear, every weight. He is right beside you. Acknowledge Him. Lean on Him. Feel His loving arms wrap around you. Trust He has you. Like the day you got saved, you knew He was there, perhaps you did not understand; but you trusted anyways. God has you. God has this.
“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. ” Matthew 11:28
God Sees and God Cares
Secondly, if He is with you, you know He sees and cares for you. God does not love like people. His love is not an attribute, it is who He is. 1 John 4:8 & 1 John 4:12 state “God is Love”
Yes, we know He is love. But in the midst of your grief you need to be reminded that this has not changed His love for you. Because this season, this trial or whatever this is has happened in your life; His love for you has NOT changed. You are still precious in His site. He still delights in your fellowship. In fact, in the midst of your tears, can you sing? Those are true words of praise, your offering to Him. God sees you right where you are and He cares. In fact, He cares more than anyone else. Cast your heart to Him. Weep. But weep in Him. Weep knowing each tear that drops, He sees. Jesus wept too. (John 11:35)
“Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” 1 Peter 5:7
As you lay it all at His feet, rest. Rest and know that everything in this world is filtered through His hands. That does NOT mean you had to experience this or you did something to earn this. I want to clarify I do NOT believe my God works that way. Can He? Yes. But every trial or heartache in the world is God’s punishment or a teaching of God, NO! The truth bomb is, we live in a sinful world. Sin is everywhere we look. And there is a spiritual warfare going on that we cannot see! God created all to know Him and have fellowship with Him! Your grief is yours. In your heart you know if God is chastening you like David. If you don’t, simply ask Him. I understand though, and I have heard the comments when someone is going through a season or trial. It just makes the weight of that grief heavier. Please do not forget Job and His friends. In the end, the hand of blessing still prevailed from God. And even in the self inflicted times of grief, nowhere in the Bible did God say He did not care or looked the other way on His children. Important facts to remember when our minds are clouded with grief.
“Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.” Matthew 5:4
But when we grieve, for whatever reason, God sees and cares. His love is above all. He is there to help us. To comfort us. To heal us. And to bind our wounds in His time. Does that process always happen quickly and swiftly? I would be lying if I said yes. As a mother of several boys, I have seen my fair share of wounds. Think of the last cut or wound you had. It initially hurt. God’s amazing design of the body. then flushed the wound the best it knows how. Then it was cleaned accordingly. Depending on the kind of wound, it may have been a quick fix. Yet, a gaping wound that needs stitches needs a little bit more precision. Likewise our heart wounds before the Lord. You grieve because it hurts. How you handle that grief at the beginning influences your healing. Everything in the world will give us justification if we look for it. Even wounds that are gaping can be handled with care and precision to allow the Lord to bind beautifully. (If you will allow Him to.)
“He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3
It is Temporary and It Will Pass
Next, remember this trial or season is temporary. Although it does not fix or relieve the pain, it can be places in a lower priority if we allow ourselves to move it. You do that easier when you know it is just temporary. Because everything in this world is temporal and in the whole scheme of things we decide how much value we allow it to have in our day to day. I am not saying this is an easy thing or you have to do this right off the bat. Each person grieves in their own way. However, we have the ultimate decision to turn that grief to glory. Glory for Him! No matter how tight we hold on, the time will pass either way. Use the temporary grief for eternal reward. It really comes down to choice. It will pass either way. You have the choice as to how.
“And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” Revelation 21:4
Your Treasure is In Heaven
Remember your treasure is in Heaven. It is amazing to see trials and seasons in our lives in the rear-view mirror. I know there are probably more hanging in the balance, but man Heaven gets sweeter everyday. Your treasure, dear friend, is in Heaven. Heartaches, trials and seasons of grief will pass. One day God will wipe all tears. Oh, how beautiful that will be. You do not want to be overcome with the cares of this world and grief, legitimate grief, that you become invaluable to Heaven. That is Satan’s desire. He wants to make you stumble, falter and be bitter from your grief. Wipe those tears sweetie, God has something planned for that grief. You overcoming your trial is a bridge to Jesus for someone God places in your life. Over and over again, I see ladies trials and victories their ministry. You speak mountains of life into your words of comfort when someone knows you went through the very trial victoriously, that they are in the midst of. Keep your eyes on heaven. Your treasure is your choice.
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life” John 3:16
You Cannot See the Whole Picture
Last, but not least, remember you cannot see the whole picture. Our God is a Holy God and nothing is by accident. If you are grieving today, I am so sorry. But, you cannot see the whole picture from your angle. Currently, you are seeing it from pain, up front, personal, maybe even targeted. I am not saying that it is from God, but I am saying your healing will be from God. You deserve to heal. You deserve to have a blessed life. You may feel like you deserve answers. But, that will only slow your healing. Will you serve Him even if you do not get the answers you yearn? Will you love Him even if there are no answer? You cannot see the whole picture, and often we do not get the answers we desire. Yet, in a sense we will never know the whole picture. We do not see all the things daily, let alone the spiritual warfare going on. Part of grieving is to remember we cannot see the whole picture.
“The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.” Psalm 34:18
When you acknowledge God and remember you are not alone, you can trust His promises. You can know He sees and cares for every tear you shed in the midst of grief. He loves and cares for you. You were designed for eternal life and promises of your home in heaven. Your treasure in heaven is for eternity. And although the pain is real and now, it will pass. When it does, you can choose to use it for His glory and be the guide to point more to Christ. You can not see the work ahead of you or how God can use your pain for His glory, but it still exists. Will you give it to God? Can you hurt, mourn, grieve and still not be bitter? The answer is yes. If you choose it. If you choose victory in Jesus.
P.S. But, I am knew here, how do you know heaven is real and my know for sure it is my eternal home? –> READ MORE of Travel Down the Roman’s Road or Let Us Travel
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